Before Mikael, I don’t think I actually understood when people told me about all the challenges they go through during parenthood. My pregnancy was an eye-opener for me and I never felt so dependant on my husband or anyone, to be honest. When Mikael came into the picture, I have come to learn a lot and I wanted to share some important lessons for the new mothers or mamas to be. Keep reading below to learn more:
1. Don’t ever get stuck to a Routine
You baby is constantly changing especially in the first year. I remember setting myself to a new routine but he would be constantly changing. For example, I trained him to sleep throughout the night but he would still wake up at night especially through the teething stage. Or when I moved a lot of my furniture pieces around so he can’t access delicate pieces; he eventually found a way around it as he got taller and stronger. Throughout the year, I have learned they will constantly change with age and you will have to adapt as you go. I actually see this as a good thing as this makes me more adaptable to situations.
2. You learn to prioritize (for the better)
I love how fast I came to prioritize everything in life. When kids keep you super busy at all times, you learn what’s important and let the rest go. This helped me a lot as an entrepreneur, instead of chasing small goals, I started looking at bigger career goals.
3. He/she will challenge your marriage to make it stronger
Something nobody tells you! My marriage with my husband was smooth before Mikael. We always had our cup of ups and downs but it wasn’t until my pregnancy and then Mikael that we started facing our challenges as a couple. When you have an infant who continuously challenges you and tests your patients, it at times causes uneasiness between the couple because let’s face it, we are sleep deprived, not used to unexpected tantrums and are facing a lot at the same time. But in the end, it will make you stronger than ever. If a couple can get through this, they can get through anything.
4. The feeling when he wants you all the time
A lot of mothers build a connection with their baby before they are born. I was so sick during pregnancy that I can hardly relate to this. When he was born, I had my share of post-partum depression and was more frustrated than anything. It wasn’t until he was 9 months old that I started building a connection with him. He started to become more clingy and would enjoy everything with me. I started seeing a bond that I never felt before. The connection felt deeper than ever and I started to enjoy him more and more.
5. The ‘Guilt’ when you have to leave your baby behind
When I leave him to my parents or a nanny, he starts crying because babies have a fear of losing us. They think we are leaving them. They are kids at the end and are still adapting to everything. Whenever I am away from him for more than 3 hours, the guilt hits me and I am rushing to get back. At this point, I have come to learn that the guilt will always be there. All I am concerned about now is having a good time when I am with him. That’s what matters more!
6. Physical and Mental State
The changes your body and mind go through to bring a human being into the world is insane. Your body will never be the same and the mental struggle you go through to adapt is enormous. In the end, motherhood has made me stronger mentally and physically. Before I conceived him, I would have never thought I would go to the gym but I did and I have never felt physically stronger.
7. It’s all rewarding at the end
I will be honest, I never understood what being rewarded at the end meant. Now that he passed his one year mark, I am beginning to see what being rewarded means. Whether you are sleep deprived, exhausted from the day, behind on work and house chores, it feels rewarding because you made it through the day. You made it!